Sara's journal: January 2008

Not forgetting what I actually want...

“There is nothing more genuine than breaking away from the chorus to learn the sound of your own voice.”

It's really easy to forget what you really want sometime and who you are. It's so easy to get caught up in processes and expectations (that you have towards yourself and others have towards you), etc.

And when life is so intense as it is at the moment in my case, you tend to forget why you are doing things, because you just keep going without reflecting.

That's what I'm trying to figure out at the moment.

It's not only a question of what you actually want, but more of a question what you want out of all the possibilities you have. I really want to cut down on my activities, so what am I going to focus on?

It's time to sit down and reflect... Before I take any further steps.

Exciting... :)

Taking a break...

So, I'm not only "talking change", I'm doing it. Took myself a day off. Yeah... In the middle of the exams, but I don't care... I deserve it! :)

What a rollercoaster...

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaah! I will work in the MC next year... I still wake up in the morning, realizing that it is not a dream and starting to plan the next few months until the term starts.

I'm in a hell of a rollercoaster at the moment: One moment I'm sooo happy, the other I'm thoughtful, the other I'm worried, the other I'm angry, then again I'm stressed, then again I'm calm... I'm having exams and there are so many other things happening in my life at the moment, that I don't know where to focus my energy. I'm just doing one thing after the other, slowly getting into a normal rythm again after the elections and the two most difficult exams...

Most of all I'm excited. Excited about that finally I have something in my life that is fixed. Something to look forward to, something that tells me: Sara, next year you will be there and there doing that.

I never realized that I don't like having an open future. I need to know where I'm heading.

And I never realized how important change is to me. I have always changed my environment: I loved changing schools, I loved going abroad on Exchange, I loved doing and Internship in Dublin, I love starting new semester with new courses.
I'm extremely happy I can move to Bern in July and get a new environment. I feel that I need it.

So, my conclusion: I need change and I need a goal! So voilà, I got it last weekend and I'm so grateful being able to work with these 3 amazing people in a team.

Kram kram from my side!